My Thoughts As I Sat in the Dentist Chair

Yesterday afternoon I had my semi annual check up with the dentist. This six month  ritual started two weeks ago with an email reminder to myself to start flossing. That way when I'm asked "have you been flossing?" I can answer "Yes" without being a complete liar. I know, with that methodology I could run for political office  if I lost just a couple scruples. Not sure if that's the right use of the word "scruples," but you get my point.

While I sat it the chair, the following thoughts went through my head:

• The dentist office really needs to replace their 1970's era false ceiling tiles.
• Wouldn't you think a nice ceiling be a priority for a dentist office?
• Why do they polish my teeth, then scrap the tater off? It's seems like waxing a car then washing it.
• They should make flavored examination gloves.
• Flavored gloves may be a bad idea, some people may subconsciously start sucking on the dentist's figures, that would be awkward.
• Although scented gloves would be an improvement.
• They should give the patient some type of handheld device with 3 buttons on it. One for "yes" one for "no" and a third for "take your hands out of my mouth so I can answer your question" so the patient can carry a conversion with the dentist without the risk of having gums stabbed or choking on the hand held mirror.
• How does that hand held mirror keep from fogging up anyway?